Friendship Diary - con't
* = a name change
I was betrayed by Sharon*, yes. I thought she and I were best friends. In the end, though, she never cared for me.
Now, I've done something ten times worse. I've hurt someone who I love very much. My best friend: Roslynne*
I met her becuase she read my diary on this page (The Friendship Page) and e-mailed me with, by far, the sweetest letter I've ever read, I've come to love her as the most important person in my life aside from my role model: Lucy Lawless.
However, I've come to a point where I'm not really sure of anything. I don't have much faith in anything or anyone, becuase as I get older I learn that there are so many people out there who are so untrustworthy it's scary. It's something I'll get over, but right now is a very scary time for me, and I'm losing my trust in everything and everyone. I'm not even entirely sure of my feelings for Roslynne anymore. One thing I do know, though, is that I never want to hurt her.
So I decided to tell her how I feel before it was too late. Now I have hurt her, and that makes me not only as bad, but worse than Sharon.
At least Sharon NEVER tried to convince me that she cared for me. I convinced myself that she did.
But Roslynne... I told her everyday that I loved her and that she was my soulmate. And I meant every word of it at the time.
Maybe if I had stopped to think of what could happen, then maybe I wouldn't have hurt her.
I still value her above any other person, besides Lucy, of course. But maybe I was just so excited about h aving someone care for me AT LAST, that I made myself believe that she was the one: my soulamte.
Maybe she is.
How can we be sure?
I don't know, but if we truly are destined for each other, then we'll find away...
MY DEFINITION OF WHAT A SOULMATE IS:
I believe that everyone is one half of a whole, and that everyone has someone out there who is the other half of their hole. The other half of their soul.
I don't think that having a soulmate should be associated wtih having a lover. They're two completely different things... soulmates aren't necessarily physical, except for snuggling and hugging and, yes, even kissing.
Finding the other half of your soul is a treasure that can't be taken lightly. Treasure your soulmate, for there is only one of them...
one that will last forever and ever and ever.
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